Premarital counselling in Pretoria
Before you say “I do,” let’s make sure you both feel seen and ready
Premarital counselling in Pretoria that helps you build connection, clarity, and confidence, beyond the big day.
Honest hearts. Honest dialogue. Honest growth.
Start with real conversations
Talk about what matters before it becomes a problem.
Build tools for togetherness
Learn how to stay open, even when things get tough.
Shape your shared story
Create a strong base for your future, built on honesty and care.
“We love each other, but are we ready for forever?”
The planning is in full swing, but what about the parts no one talks about? Like how you’ll handle conflict. Or what loyalty means to each of you. Or whether you see family, money, and commitment in the same way.
These aren’t just questions, they’re stories you’re already telling, often without realising it.
In this space, we bring those stories into the open. So you start married life with clarity, not confusion.
What is Premarital Counselling?
Before vows are exchanged, there are often questions that go unspoken. What does commitment really mean to you both? How will you manage conflict or change. Premarital counselling opens up space for those conversations, with honesty, curiosity, and respect.
This work isn’t about pointing out problems. It’s about strengthening what’s already there, clarifying what matters most, and creating shared meaning before you begin your next chapter.
Premarital Counselling in Waterkloof Ridge, Pretoria
Before the vows, are you noticing any of this?
Premarital Counselling in Waterkloof Ridge, Pretoria
Unspoken expectations
You each carry ideas about what marriage should look like, but haven’t quite named them yet.
Avoiding hard topics
Money, children, boundaries, family, it feels easier not to talk about them. But something feels unsettled beneath the silence.
Unclear roles
You’re unsure how things will work when life gets harder—who holds what, and how do you support each other?
Needing clarity
You want to feel confident about the life you’re building.
Pre-wedding stress
You're fighting more than usual and wondering if it’s just the pressure, or something more.
Different values
What matters most to each of you doesn’t always match.
Premarital counselling helps you talk honestly now so you’re not trying to untangle it later. It’s about clarity, not correction. And building a strong foundation you both believe in.
Approaches I Use in Premarital Counselling
Premarital Counselling in Waterkloof Ridge, Pretoria
This is a space to slow down and talk about what matters, not just the wedding, but the life you’re building together. I gently guide you through conversations about values, expectations, and the small things that often get missed. My role is to help you notice patterns early, grow in self-awareness, and lay a steady foundation for the road ahead.
Externalising the problem
“We firstly externalise the problem. Like I said, the problem is the problem. The person is not the problem.”
“We name the problem as something that is outside the person… it means that I also will remove people from my club of life who do not belong there anymore.”Deconstructing the problem
“We will deconstruct the problem so that we can see what is actually going on. What’s the tip of the iceberg that this person is talking about — but what is really underneath the water level of this iceberg?”
Identifying hidden values and skills
“We will identify hidden values, hidden skills that this person has used before. But those skills just need a little bit of dusting off.”
“Sometimes they feel that they can’t handle it, but they’ve shown the resilience previous times.”Co-creating the alternative story
“We then go and create the new narrative. We also say it’s the alternative story. We thicken the alternative story. And the dominant problem story is not the main thing anymore, it’s all about the new stories that we focus on.”
I don’t give advice. I ask better questions.
I’m Vanessa, a narrative counsellor based in Pretoria. I serve individuals, teens, couples, and families who are ready to feel safe in their own story again. Back when I was a teacher, I loved seeing people grow, but I also saw how many of them needed something beyond skills. They needed to be heard. Not fixed. That stayed with me.
I still get chills when a client says, “I feel lighter.” Narrative counselling isn’t magic, but it can feel that way when you finally feel seen without being judged. Some say I’m the calmest person they’ve met. Others say I ask the one question they didn’t know they needed. Either way, I’m all in. I listen until the pieces make sense.
You show up. You speak. I listen. We follow your story, not a script. Slowly, you find that your past doesn’t have to define you, and your future doesn’t have to scare you.
ABOUT ME
How Premarital Counselling Works
HOW IT WORKS
Before you start your life together, I help you lay a strong foundation, built on shared values, trust, and honest expectations.
I listen to both your stories
I get to know what brought you together, what you value, and how each of you imagines your life ahead.
We name what matters most
We explore differences, hopes, and unspoken fears, creating space for deeper understanding before they become future pain points.
You find your way forward
You’ll leave with tools to support your growth, handle conflict well, and build a marriage grounded in respect and connection.
Frequently Asked Questions
Vanessa Crous Narrative Counselling
When should we start premarital counselling?
Anytime before the wedding is a good time. Even if you’re not engaged yet, it’s never too early to prepare for a strong foundation.
What will we talk about?
We’ll explore values, roles, expectations, communication, and how you each want to grow, together and as individuals.
What if we already get along well?
That’s great; premarital counseling helps keep it that way. It’s about being proactive, not fixing problems.
Will this bring up conflict?
It might bring up differences, but we work through them gently, with care and understanding.
How many sessions do you recommend?
Usually 3–6 sessions, depending on what you’d like to cover.
Premarital Counselling in Waterkloof Ridge, Pretoria
You don’t need to guess your way into marriage
Premarital counselling in Pretoria that gives you emotional tools, calm conversations, and a stronger connection, before the big day.
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You’ll talk about the things that often go unsaid
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You’ll feel more confident about your shared future
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You’ll explore how you both handle conflict, pressure, and growth
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You’ll learn how to support each other in real-life situations
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You’ll be gently guided through conversations that matter
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You’ll build emotional habits you’ll rely on for years
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You’ll unpack beliefs about love, family, and commitment
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You’ll spot any hidden patterns early—before they take root
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You’ll walk into your marriage knowing you’ve already started well
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You’ll feel more united, not just excited
Get in touch when you're ready
Counselling in Pretoria & Online Across South Africa
Whether you’re considering narrative counselling for the first time, booking a session for your teen, or looking for help with a family or couple dynamic, I’d love to hear from you.
If you’re not sure what you need yet, that’s okay too. Just send a message. You don’t have to have it all figured out.
- Call: 082 324 9735
- 414 Cliff Avenue, Waterkloof Ridge Ext 2, Pretoria, 0181
- Online counselling across South Africa
Last step: Press SEND. (psstttt… we just became best friends.)
This Work Is Gentle, But It Changes Lives
testimonials
Vanessa het my 18-jarige dogter met spesiale behoeftes met soveel geduld en liefde hanteer. Deur die manier wat sy werk, het sy haar vertroue ten volle gewen. Sy het absoluut ‘n passie vir wat sy doen. Baie dankie Vanessa!
Vanessa’s caring approach brought real breakthroughs. She listens with empathy, offers clear insights, and helps you make sense of difficult thoughts and emotions. Her support has not only helped me grow personally but also improved how I show up in my work and business.
Vanessa Crous Narrative Counselling
Premarital Counselling in Waterkloof Ridge, Pretoria
You’ve chosen each other. Now choose to start well. You don’t need to be unsure or perfect. Just willing to prepare with care.
