Couples Counselling in Pretoria
Not getting through to each other anymore? You’re not the only ones.
Couples counselling in Pretoria for those who want connection without conflict.
Real people. Real stories. Real change.
Rebuild trust
Start again without starting over.
Speak clearly
Say what matters without shutting down.
Feel close again
Let the silence lift.
When small things feel too big
It begins with a comment. A sigh. A look. You feel the shift, and suddenly you are miles apart in the same room. Again. You want to talk, but it ends in an argument. You want peace, but there is silence between you. You’re not sure how you got here. You’re tired of walking on eggshells and hoping things will get better on their own. Somewhere along the way, love got buried under layers of pain, stress and misunderstanding. But it doesn’t have to stay there.
We see you as co-authors of a story that's temporarily lost its way. Because the problem is the problem, not you, not your partner.
Are you facing any of these in your relationship?
Couples Counselling in Waterkloof Ridge, Pretoria
Conversations go nowhere
You talk, but it always ends in frustration.
More fights than connection
The smallest things turn into full-blown arguments.
You feel far apart
It’s like you live together, but you’re not really together.
Trust feels broken
Something happened, and it’s hard to feel safe again.
Parenting pulls you apart
You don’t agree on how to raise the kids.
You feel stuck
You’re not sure what’s wrong, just that it’s not working.
Couples counselling creates a space where you can slow down to understand what’s really going on and reconnect, with honesty, care and hope.
What is couples counselling?
You weren’t born with a manual for love. Building a healthy partnership is exhausting and it’s completely normal to hit rough patches along the way. The same old arguments, feeling like you’re flatmates instead of lovers, walking on eggshells around each other, these aren’t signs that your relationship is broken. They are signs that your relationship history needs to be rewritten.
At Vanessa Crous Narrative Counselling in Pretoria, I provides a safe space for you and your partner to learn these important skills, for example, how to communicate with curiosity instead of defensiveness, externalise problems instead of blaming each other, and really listen to each other’s story without trying to fix it.
Couples Counselling in Waterkloof Ridge, Pretoria
My Couples Counselling Services in Pretoria
Couples Counselling | Waterkloof Ridge, Pretoria
Relationship Counselling
Feeling disconnected or misunderstood?
I help you both make sense of the distance and rebuild safety and closeness.
Premarital Counselling
Want to start your marriage strong?
I help you prepare with honest conversations and tools to grow together.
Marriage Counselling
Feeling stuck in old patterns?
I help you reconnect, repair trust, and move forward with understanding.
Divorce Counselling
Separation full of conflict or pain?
I help you part with clarity, respect, and care for what matters most.
The Approach I Use in Couples Counselling
Couples Counselling in Waterkloof Ridge, Pretoria
Every couple is different. I don’t follow scripts or hand out advice. I use narrative counselling to help you understand the story behind your patterns, and how to shift them. Below is the process I guide couples through, gently and with care.
Externalising the problem
“We firstly externalise the problem. Like I said, the problem is the problem. The person is not the problem.”
“We name the problem as something that is outside the person… it means that I also will remove people from my club of life who do not belong there anymore.”Deconstructing the problem
“We will deconstruct the problem so that we can see what is actually going on. What’s the tip of the iceberg that this person is talking about, but what is really underneath the water level of this iceberg?”
Identifying hidden values and skills
“We will identify hidden values, hidden skills that this person has used before. But those skills just need a little bit of dusting off.”
“Sometimes they feel that they can’t handle it, but they’ve shown the resilience previous times.”Co-creating the alternative story
“We then go and create the new narrative. We also say it’s the alternative story. We thicken the alternative story. And the dominant problem story is not the main thing anymore, it’s all about the new stories that we focus on.”
Here, Your Story Matters
I’m Vanessa. I offer narrative counselling to people who feel unseen, stuck, or emotionally exhausted, and are finally ready for something different. I’m just someone who’s lived through my own messy seasons. I know what it’s like to be dismissed, oversimplified, or told to “just move on.” That’s why I chose this work.
I’m still amazed that I get to do something that makes a real difference in people’s lives. This isn’t just about listening, it’s about helping you hear yourself clearly for the first time in years. Take it from my clients: “You ask things in a way that makes sense.” “I felt seen for the first time.” I’m gentle, honest, and not afraid to name the real things with care.
Working with me means no assumptions, no clipboard advice. Just real conversations, grounded in narrative work, that help you get clear on who you are and how to live that truth with more confidence.
ABOUT ME
My approach to couples counselling
HOW IT WORKS
You’re not just two people in conflict. You’re two stories that stopped meeting in the middle. I help you find that middle again, with care, honesty, and real tools that work.
I listen to both your stories
I take time to understand how each of you sees the relationship, and what you hope for. This helps me hold both stories with care and build a full picture without judgement.
We name what’s really going on
In joint sessions, we begin to gently unpack the patterns, roles, and pain points that have been shaping your relationship. We separate the problem from the person and start making space for something new.
You find your way forward
Each session brings more clarity, connection, and honest conversation. I guide you to communicate differently, repair trust, and build the kind of relationship that feels safe, real, and close again.
Frequently Asked Questions
Vanessa Crous Narrative Counselling
How long will we be in couples counselling?
That depends on what you’re facing and what you want from the process. Some couples come for a few sessions to work through something specific. Others stay longer to unpack deeper patterns. I usually suggest starting with at least three sessions.
What happens in the first session?
We focus on understanding what brings you in, what’s felt hard, and what each of you hopes will change. I’ll guide the conversation gently, making space for both voices to be heard without pressure.
What if my partner doesn’t want to come?
That’s more common than you think. If one of you is unsure or nervous, we can talk about those concerns first. It’s okay to start slow. Sometimes, just showing up together is the first step.
What if one of us feels uncomfortable in sessions?
You’re not expected to open up all at once. I work hard to create a space that feels safe and respectful for both of you. If something feels off, we’ll talk about it, nothing gets brushed aside.
Can couples counselling work if things feel really bad?
Yes. Even in heavy seasons, it’s possible to rebuild trust and connection. The process is slow and kind, and we focus on what’s still worth holding onto.
Couples Counselling in Waterkloof Ridge, Pretoria
It doesn’t have to stay like this.
Couples counselling in Pretoria that helps you reconnect, rebuild trust, and talk without fear.
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You’ll finally say what’s been sitting between you for months
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You’ll stop avoiding hard conversations because of how they might end
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You’ll feel more like a partner and less like a housemate
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You’ll learn how to listen without defensiveness
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You’ll hear your partner in ways you forgot were possible
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You’ll have a calm space to work through hurt
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You’ll stop repeating the same fight in different words
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You’ll leave with tools, not just talk
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You’ll feel more hopeful, even if things are hard right now
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You’ll be reminded of what’s still worth saving
Get in touch when you're ready
Counselling in Pretoria & Online Across South Africa
Whether you’re considering narrative counselling for the first time, booking a session for your teen, or looking for help with a family or couple dynamic, I’d love to hear from you.
If you’re not sure what you need yet, that’s okay too. Just send a message. You don’t have to have it all figured out.
- Call: 082 324 9735
- 414 Cliff Avenue, Waterkloof Ridge Ext 2, Pretoria, 0181
- Online counselling across South Africa
Last step: Press SEND. (psstttt… we just became best friends.)
This Work Is Gentle, But It Changes Lives
testimonials
Vanessa brings warmth, insight, and thoughtful guidance. She asks the right questions without pressure and always comes prepared. Her mix of knowledge and discernment helps you shift unhelpful beliefs. Her values add a layer of trust that feels grounding and safe.
Dankie tannie Vanessa dat ek altyd met tannie kon gesels en dat tannie my gehelp het. Ek het altyd uitgesien daarna om soontoe te kom.
Vanessa Crous Narrative Counselling
Couples Counselling in Waterkloof Ridge, Pretoria
You don’t need all the answers, you just need a space to start again.
